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You've survived the holiday with husbear's parents. You made nice at the office Xmas party. Now, it's your turn. by Buzzed Beef
Be not afraid of going slowly,
be only afraid of standing still . . .
- Chinese Proverb
If you’re like me, when you decide to do something, you go all out. When I decide to diet, I basically stop everything but water and watercress. When I start back at the gym, I try to train every part of my dormant body. The result? Great Abs? No. Lean mean fighting machine? No. One very tired, sore, cranky me? Oh, yea that’s the one.
I have tried every program under the sun. Lemonade diets, Hollywood Diets, you name it! I’ve zoned my carbs straight to South Beach! And while I’ve resisted the temptation of the Abdomizer or the Thigh Master, I do have a weight bench (good for storing unfolded laundry), Chin Up bar (good for the clothes that make it to a hanger) and an inclined sit-up bench (ok, this one just takes up space in the garage).
I am the guy they designed impulse shopping for. I buy the magazines at the Piggly Wiggly (yes, I shop at Piggly Wiggly, what’s your point?) while waiting in the checkout line. I am drawn to the promise of A New Body in 10 days, or The Secrets of Blasting My Biceps (I honestly don’t believe I have ever blasted any part of my body, and that has probably kept me out of the ER). I am pretty sure I have heard the checkout clerk giggle as I plop down the latest edition of Buff and Ripped.
So after years of research and a few Cosmo Sex Questionnaires (What? You thought the ladies had cornered the market on those little secrets and sex tips?), I have learned that . . .
People hate change . . .
It’s easier to keep doing what we are doing, than trying to change. That’s why we revert back to our old ways so easily. According to the American Academy of Family Physicians, it takes 21 days to change a bad habit into a good one. That’s 21 days without cigarette. That’s 21 days of walking. That’s 21 days without a latte. 21 days is a long time . . . It’s even longer, if you are set unrealistic goals or try to change too much at once.
And let’s not forget in the midst of our makeovers, life goes on. Husbear get sick, the dog pees on the carpet and your boss, well – you know that one. Many people underestimate the inertia of their current job, their chosen role at work and at home, their partner, their friends and colleagues and associates, their current habits, their current tastes and family responsibilities. So, as we approach a new year, let’s look at resolutions . . .
Top 10 resolutions . . .
1. Lose Weight
2. Quit Smoking
3. Exercise More
4. Eat Healthier
5. Make more money
6. Go back to school
7. Pay off debt
8. Spend less
9. Make more time for . . .
10. Get more organized
Most resolutions fail with in the first month. I would argue most folks don’t get over the 21 day hump. So, obviously we need another approach.
Be not afraid . . .
Go slowly. Set realistic achievable and sustainable goals. I believe in doing one thing a day that was healthier than the day before. After a week, you will have done 7 healthy things for yourself. After a month (and that dreaded 21 day threshold), you will have done 30 good things for your body and soul. And, if you embraced this philosophy in 2008, you will do 365 things great things for your body. Will you lose 30 pounds in 2 weeks? NO. But, you will start to move to a healthier place.
Be not afraid . . .
I love to cook, but sometimes life just gets in the way. Remember the Crockpot your mother gave you a few years back? Well, dust it off for some hearty winter meals! 
Husbear and I don't always share the same tastes in music. His tend towards classic rock, while mine tends towards beats per minute. So, I don't normally get to cut loose at home.
However, today husbear was away with family stuff, and I was home being domestic - never pretty.
So, I crank up the iPod and set about day. Hmm, show tunes? Nah. Britney remix? Oh please!
OMG - Hazel Dean. 1984 - Searchin' - Big Shoulder Pads - A gay ole' trip down memory lane. And then it's a slippery slop from there . . . Enjoy!
I remember my first Christmas tree. I was 23, and had moved to NYC to be the Master of The Universe – it was the eighties – think Wall Street. Anyway, my first apartment was a tiny six floor walk up on 53rd and 9th, but I had arrived . . .
As the holidays approached, I ventured out for my first tree. I spent weeks watching Martha Stewart in preparation. That bitch had an estate in Connecticut, I had a studio in Hell’s Kitchen, but none the less in the more is more mantra of the era – she was a goddess to this fledgling little gay boy.
Let me start by telling you that you’ve got to love something to drag it up six flights – whether it’s a couch, a trick or even tree – you think twice before your make the ascent. I went with a very reasonable table top model.
And now the decorations!!
I ventured down to Barney’s in the Chelsea – known for their absolutely fabulous windows – I think that year they featured Jesse Helm’s as Santa with a naughty and nice list – classic. Once I got a look at Barney’s prices, I quickly headed over to Fortunoffs.
I opted for a Victorian motif - Mother of Pearl ornaments, naked cherubs, white lights and tons of frilly ribbons. Hey, I was a little twink at the time, cut me some slack. It was FABULOUS with a capital FAB!!
I invited my best friend Carol over to admire my master piece -
“That’s the gayest fucking tree I’ve ever seen . . .”
by Buzzed Beef
One of our many fans writes “What foods are good for sex?”
Hot: Here is a question I can answer! Food and sex, yum my favorite combo!
Heavy: You know the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Food and sex have been linked together through out the ages. History is ripe with the human pursuit of aphrodisiacs in many forms – even risking death. For example, the Puffer Fish, considered both a delicacy and an aphrodisiac in Japan. If the poisonous gland is not properly removed, the tiniest taste is deadly. The flirt with death is said to give a sexual thrill. The things we do for love . . .
Hot: Only you would think of that. And, I don’t think that is what our dear reader is asking. I suggest a visit to the produce aisle with his partner. There are always the old standbys like carrots and cucumbers. And a little creative carving can make for an interesting date. And don't forget your condoms!
Heavy: And carrots are good for your eyesight, so you don't have to worry about that going blind thing. Condoms? - I don’t think we have to worry about getting STDs from the vegetables.
Hot: No, it just makes for easier clean up. Going blind? You've been talking to your mother, again - haven't you? Anyway, to continue--a frozen banana can also be fun. Just make sure it freezes in a good shape.
Heavy: As opposed to a bad shape? One of my favorites is sucking on an ice cube before sucking on something else – I just got a shiver thinking about it.
Hot: And don’t forget my personal favorite—chocolate syrup. I suppose if you were worried about the carbs you could make it with cocoa powder and artificial sweetener.
Heavy: Artificial sweetener? You’re the romantic, eh? What about strawberries and whipped cream?
Hot: You can use the spray can to spray whipped cream on the parts you want licked!
Heavy: Cover me from head to toe.
Hot: I like the way you’re thinking.
by Travis Smith
Now days it is even easier to achieve a vintage holiday look - so many stores like Target and Kmart offer the retro Christmas look in ornaments, trees, gift wrap, and more. For the die hard purist, you can always find a vintage aluminum tree on eBay, but be prepared to spend some serious money - no bargains at this time of year! A couple of years ago I was bidding on a rare vintage pink aluminum tree and dropped out at $300 - it ended up going for $1,200! You can also find rotating tree stands and that venerable classic: the color wheel for an instant psychedelic effect.
Another great online resource for unique artificial trees is - www.christmastreesgalore.com. I was challenged this year when designing the holiday displays for Copenhagen Imports in Scottsdale - I wanted three coordinating Christmas trees to go with my color scheme of black & white, red, and silver.
I hope this article helped to inspire you with your holiday decorating – I’ve got to run and finish my snow village of vintage bottle brush trees (“but that’s another show”)...
Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!
by Buzzed Beef
The IBR Beneficiaries Committee is proud to announce the selection of our three IBR Beneficiaries:
Lyon Martin Women’s Health Services: Founded in 1979, Lyon Martin's mission is to provide personalized health care and support services to women and transgendered people who lack access to quality health care because of their sexual orientation and gender identity, regardless of their ability to pay. Historically, we have had a niche serving lesbian, bisexual, and transgender (LBT) patients--who often avoid health care for fear of discrimination. No other community clinic in the Bay Area is replicating our targeted services and no other LBT organization is providing direct care. More than 86% of our patients are uninsured, 90% have an income level below 200% of the federal poverty level, 32% are people of color, and 20% are homeless.
Need a little comfort and joy this busy holiday season? How about a warm, fuzzy bear?
Nothing brightens the home like a few woofy accessories.
Our Woodsy Bear Pillow is 18" square and made with New Zealand wool.
Many of our friends work themselves up into a lather with their holiday cookie baking. Days and nights toiling away in a Martha Stewart like frenzy to make the damn holiday bright. Even the Mistress of Procurement claims to make "the best damn chocolate chip cookies on the planet!"
I wouldn't know, despite having shared the last 4 years of our lives together, I have never had one of "the best damn chocolate chip cookies on the planet!"
What up with that?
And Jesse sends the crack cookies every year. Crack cookies you ask? Oh, silly bear!!
Every year Jesse sends up a tin of the wonderful delights. Unfortunately the sugar content is off the Richter Scale. First the sugar buzz, then the big crash. Last year, I ate one of these morsels after skipping lunch. Liza came in to find me bouncing off the walls and photocopying the contents of our office. . .
No more crack cookies!!So, we asked our friend Chef Tom of BearlyEdible to whip up a little something for us.
Here’s what he told us –
It just would not be Christmas without the cut-out, iced sugar cookies. They are everywhere this time of year. Coworkers bring in trays to share. They are at reception desks and checkout counters. I’ll most likely receive gift boxes of holiday goodies where decorated Santa’s, Christmas trees and snowmen are the centerpiece of the cookies.
And of course – the recipe.
BOSF’s Holiday beverage benefit is Sunday, December 16th
at the Lone Star Saloon (4-8pm).
We have a lot going on so get ready for a great event which will include:
by Travis Smith
Are you dreaming of a Modern Christmas? Many Mid Century Modern enthusiasts are challenged at this time of year as to how to decorate their homes for the holidays. No need to fret - you can incorporate a festive look without sacrificing your MCM sensibility!
As a former vintage modern dealer and author of “Kitschmasland!,” a book devoted to Retro Christmas decor from the 1950s through the 70s, I have amassed quite a collection over the years. My partner and I like to mix these holiday decorations with our year-round collections.
You can do the same - look around your space for accessories that may translate easily into that “Atomic Yule” look. Ceramics or art glass in red, white, or green can be used as tablescapes with dramatic poinsettia arrangements. Fill up a modern glass cylinder vase with silver ball ornaments for a simple but elegant centerpiece. Display your vintage tin toy collection on shelves with other Christmas decorations or around the base of your tree. The possibilities are endless.
The Bears of San Francisco are proud to present..
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(Madrid, Spain; Dec 5-9)
(Gatlinburg, Tennessee; Dec 6-9)
(Indianapolis, IN, Dec 14-16)
(Berlin, Germany; Dec 31)
(San Diego, CA; Jan 17, 2008)
(Tuscon, AZ; Jan 18-21, 2008)
(Puerto Vallarta, Mexico; Jan 27)
IBR - International Bear Rendezvous
(San Francisco, CA; Feb 14-18, 2008)
(Quebec; Feb 15-17)
Bear Essentials 12 Under Southern Stars
(Sydney, Australia; Feb 26 - Mar 2)
(Frankfurt, Germany;Feb 29 - Mar 2, 2008)
Texas Bear Round UP - Cirque Des Ours
(Dallas, TX; Mar 20-23)
(Albuquerque, NM; April 3-6)
(Rye, NY; May 1-4)
(Philadelphia, PA; May 18-11, 2008)
Bearwatch 9 -Booty Camp
(Galveston, TX; May 23-25)
The Exclusive Party for Bears, Cubs, Chubs
and Admirers During Disney Gay Days
(Orlando, FL; June 6, 2008)
(Provincetown, MA; July 12-19, 2008)
Lazy Bear Weekend 2008
(Guerneville, CA; July 30 - August 4, 2008)
Hi Bear Nation 2008 - Bears in the Woods
(St. Louis, MO; Nov 13 - 16, 2008)
